I Know in Whom I Have Trusted

I just finished my evening prayers. In my prayer, I expressed how today I just felt different. I wouldn't say it was a good kind of different. It was almost as if I were outside of myself, looking in.

As is part of the human experience, I have gone through ups and downs the past couple of weeks. Several days ago I was at a low. Over the weekend I was at a high. Right now I would say I am in the middle, somewhere.

It is so crazy to me how easily I can forget the little things. I look back on my day today and see that I filled it with many good things, but I completely forgot my scripture study. Satan is so cunning that way. He manages to find a way to distract me with so many "good things," that I forget to do the most important things. I think that is why I felt a little distant from my Heavenly Father.

I didn't feel as inspired. I didn't feel as uplifted. I didn't feel as whole.

Doubts have begun to seep into my mind. Have I bitten off more than I can chew? Am I in way over my head? Did I take this whole "I will do whatever You want me to do" thing too far? Can I really balance everything?

Then the words "I Know in Whom I Have Trusted" come to my mind. These are the words from the last chapter I finished in my addiction recovery book. This entire chapter was on trusting in the Lord, trusting that there is nothing so broken that cannot be fixed by my Savior. There is no task to be completed that cannot be done if I rely upon Jesus Christ.

Everything I have done, everything I am doing, I have felt inspired to do. Even writing this blog. I sit at my computer and it's as if I feel the words rush into my head and flow down through my fingertips. Maybe just for me. Maybe just for you.

I just have to let my inhibitions go and trust in Him. I know Him and I trust Him.

Trust: firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something.

If any one being is reliable, truthful, able and strong, it is the Savior. If any one person can help me to become all that I am destined to be, it's Him. I know this with all my heart!

There are so many opinions out there, including my own, that range from "You can do anything" to "You should simplify." Sometimes I just don't know which voice to listen to. Regarding this, Colleen Harrison says: "We must always remember that with all our reading, studying and searching out answers, the absolute last word in the contruction of our program of recovery from compulsive/addictive [or doubtful] behaviors should be the Lord's."

Now is the time for me to let Him have the last word. Afterall, he is the author of my story.