Potty Training Follow-Up

I want to preface this post by explaining that I am reading this incredible book called He Did Deliver Me From Bondage by Colleen C. Harrison. It is the book the LDS A.R.P. (Addiction Recovery Program) uses for all of their twelve step programs and it has sparked a great change within me.

Why am I reading a twelve-step book you ask? Simple. I have felt that I need to rely upon my Savior through this whole weight-loss and healthy lifestyle initiative and I readily admit that I have many of the symptoms of a compulsive eater. I know you are incredibly interested in this and I promise I will post more about that later (wink wink), but for now I want to share a little moment I had experiencing a change of heart (which is a HUGE part of the twelve-step process).

My latest post was about the miracles of prayer in the proces of potty training. I tell you, I do not rescind any of my statements from that post, but we did go through, well, a little battle a few days after what I thought was a major turn around.

Several nights ago I went to bed and realized that I had experienced a small change of heart. It wasn't regarding my health and fitness, it was in relation to my two-year-old's potty training.

On Tuesday, I had hit that point. You know the one where you explode. I realized that I couldn't take it anymore. I couldn't keep fighting her and having this battle every few minutes over using the toilet. I broke. I yelled at her. I told her "I don't have time for this!!! Why won't you just go potty on the toilet?!?!" She began to cry and I stormed away. I left her there on the toilet while I got the other kids ready. I had to be to a meeting at work and was dropping them off at a friend's house.

Throughout the rest of the morning, the guilt hung over me like a black cloud. I was so disappointed in myself. I couldn't believe that I had let my emotions get the better of me. When I came to pick them up I hugged her tight and told her I loved her.

I asked my friend what I should do and she recommended giving her a reward every time she even sat on the potty, even if she didn't actually go. I took this to heart and applied it the rest of the day. My daughter continued to mess her pants, but I was so discouraged that I didn't even react. I just cleaned it up and moved on with our day.

That night I confessed my wrongs to the Lord. I apologized for yelling at one of his precious children and for making her feel badly. I asked him to show me the way. I pled that he would enlighten me to the right way of doing things. I even asked if I should just give up and try again in a few months or even a year.

I was quiet. I was still. I submitted my will to Him and let it all go.

The next day, she didn't wet her pants one time. She always told me when she needed to go potty. She only had one little accident in her pants but told me it was yucky and finished in the toilet. Nothing felt forced anymore. My sense of urgency was no longer there, just acceptance. I rewarded her every time she even sat on the potty, which really helped her to relax. But more than that it was like a light went on for her. She suddenly understood how to get herself to go on demand. Instead of sitting on the toilet for 10 minutes at a time and then almost accidentally going potty, she could sit down and go within seconds.

As I knelt in prayer that night the light went on for me. I realized that nothing had really changed except my attitude. I conversed with the Lord and thanked him for his patience with me.

You see, life is full of little breakthroughs. I always think that once I make it past the first one I am home free, but more often than not, we have to keep learning, keep turning to our Father.

I am proud to say that my daughter is now fully potty trained. She has only had one accident in the past 5 days. But even more than that I accept and admit that it was not me that made this happen. I was a part of the process but the ultimate success is purely attributed to the Lord. He changed me and he changed her.

To many this may seem like an inconsequential experience, but I believe that it can teach me and anyone who is willing to listen how to approach all problems no matter how big or small. If it matters to you, it matters to Him and He can bring about that change of heart if you allow it.